Getting back into the groove...

It’s time to start scribing again. Not because I have a plethora of wisdom that should be spread to the masses but rather because it forces me to slow down and refine the pinball game in my mind. Key to the verb “to refine”, is conciseness. My hope and aim is that these entries and blogs will not be long winded, because lets face it…if I loose interest while writing, then heaven help you as the reader.

Today’s topic…is witnessing.

I’m going to spout out a lot of verbage here and my hope is that it is all taken with a grain of salt in that my definitions to these words might not be your definitions. So don’t throw me out with the bathwater of my language.

Witnessing… the mere mention of this act causes “progressive” Christians to cringe. Images of sweat glazed men in three piece suits on street corners proclaiming the sins of the world jump to there minds or at the very least a fake 20 dollar bill laying innocently on the ground hiding the Romans road on the back. Splash… the witnessing baby lays in a puddle out side the bathtub.

My most recent kick is standing up for these tossed “bath babies” in the Christian faith.

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Hrrnnnnnnnnn….Shorter Ben, loose the hot air…

So witnessing has become this thing that Christians join in lambasting, and instead we never mention a blasted thing to our friends about something that we claim lies at the core of our being…something that is supposed to give us life. Call it fear, call it cultural sensitivity, I don’t care. The fact is that we have this subconscious hesitation to looking like a radical.

Then it hit me. To be a witness is not to be someone who has mastered the tenants of apologetic or the various theodicy’s, no, the literal definition of a witness is to be one who has seen. All too often I find myself sharing stories that are not mine. I don’t suppose this is inherently bad, but if I don’t share my own story, and all the doubts and triumphs that come along with it then I’m not being a witness, I’m being a parrot.....maybe more on this later once i get more thoughts....

There is an Oswald Chambers quote that says something to the effect that the mountain doesn’t teach us something, the mountain makes us something. I’d be really curious to look from the outside and see what I am being made into, because from the inside I feel a whirlwind of emotions, struggles and triumphs.

First things first. I left you all hanging on the news that once again I was going to go into the mountains as a guide. Despite having some of the most extreme weather I have had, (needing all 11 trip participants to set up a single tent because of the high winds/ rain) , it was one of the most supportive/encouraging trips I have been on. It was a father/son/friend trip with a broad mix of personalities, but every single one was supportive of me and my guide partner and happy to be there. (It still blows my mind that one of their favorite times on the trip was in the middle of the rain/wind storm because of how I’d pushed and stretched them)

One of the most supportive members on the trip was a South African Doctor who absolutely ate everything up. Think of the mix between the enthusiasm of Jim Pittis, the interpersonal connection of Milly Ware, and the calmness/smile of Don Hafercamp. Needless to say he and the rest of the trip members all rejuvenated my excitement for being on a Beyond trip.

On the base camp side of things, Mt. Pride continues to be a formidable peak. I am constantly learning lessons in humility, leadership and in followership? Well maybe not lessons, maybe just growth opportunities.

Its crazy how time races by here. Always something to see, think about, double-check…etc. It is becoming quite apparent that I’m not going to be able to indefinitely put off the rest of my life thus I’m thinking more and more about what the fall may bring.

Well, sorry this is all I have for now.
Until next time.

Ben

July 9, 2008

I’m pretty sure a key component of growth is change. Just when I get to a point where I feel semi-ready for my job, bam. Role-reversal. Guess who is guiding the next Mt. Albert trip? That’s right, yours truly. Because of the large volume of trips and the conversely small amount of guides, I have been called out of retirement to once again strap on my hiking boots. (Don’t worry mom, by the time you get this I’ll probably be back in my warm bunk). It’s been interesting to watch my progression in attitudes concerning this next trip. At first I wanted nothing to do with guiding again…I had spent enough time and energy learning my new role that I wasn’t keen on re-hashing old lessons learned. Then after going on two recons in the last week my body is definitely feeling a desire for rest. But despite all these hesitations, I’m excited to once again be on the front lines. I’m excited to see if and/or how God will touch this trip. I can’t think of a better group dynamic or route that I would rather be given…It’s a father/son/friend trip lead by a man of similar character to Ernie on a route that leaves a lot of time for content. So needless to say, I’m excited to see what comes.

Well its 9 o’clock at night and time for me to start my shift of the all night gear drying session in what we affectionately call “the sauna”. I love wet tents.

I look forward to seeing and hearing from you all.

Love, Ben

June 28, 2008

It blows me away how no matter how you come to this place, and no matter what you do here, given the slightest chance, God will stretch you. I have to apologize for not writing sooner, but my mind and body have been going at full tilt since I've gotten here. I carry a radio, a book of jobs, behind the scenes info, and I attend leadership meetings, ...but I feel the only reason that people let me lead them is out of grace alone. Every time I turn around I feel as if I'm learning a new lesson in my job, leadership and general living. I don't know if its foolishness to hope that this will change to any less frequency or if I should just learn to accept this mindset for the rest of my life.

Well enough of the reflective/introspective mumbo-shumumbo. In other news, Mackenzie (Ben's 2 year old, cousins’ daughter who is spending the summer in base camp) continually steals the heart of the camp with her sponge like vocabulary, literally adopting any word the moment it is said to her. My personal favorites include Narcolepsy, Bioluminescence, and "Rock on, dude".

It's a rich experience being on this side of the mountains, watching the new guides go through the same things I did. I'm excited to sit down with those whom I'm closest with and be an ear to them, not that I would have any mind-blowing insights to offer, but simply that I could be a source of hope?...no I'll call it a source of perseverance.

I feel a familiarity with the fact that, once again, I know I'm leaving out a myriad of details and stories. But in reality most of my attempts would fall remarkably short of properly sharing the depth and breadth of my experiences so far...and the summer hasn't technically started for us. But suffice it to say I love my staff and I love my job and I look forward to seeing God in real personal ways. I love you all and look forward to seeing you / hearing from you.

Ben

Building Proper Foundations

Well folks,

Every great saga has three parts: Star Wars, Back to the future, Indiana Jones (lets just forget that last movie), Lord of the Rings…the list goes on and on. So needless to say it is only fair that if I’m going to have a good story for my grand-kids, then I just have to head up North again.

The last two years I’ve been a mountain guide, but this year my official title this summer at Beyond Malibu (check out www.beyondmalibu.org) is Male Base Camp Coordinator. Basically that means I'm the guy that assigns work projects to the staff when they're in basecamp. So needless to say, I'm expecting this summer to be vastly different that my last two.... in situation only. I'm afraid I won't be writing tales of mountain tops, glaciers, or breathtaking views; but alas a constant theme threaded through all three of my summers is the fact that indeed I will be playing a key role in these stories. As such I foresee a myriad of opportunities for challenge and growth that will inevitably stem from my--incredibly human like qualities. I wouldn't be surprised if humility, patience, endurance, and grace will be my peaks to climb this summer. I can only hope that those around me will be willing to put up with all my trips, stumbles, and full on falls that undoubtedly will come.

Nonetheless I eagerly look forward to playing my small role at beyond this summer as a support for others who get to go through an experience that has already been so transformational in my own life. More so than in any other time in my life, there is a wall of question marks that await me on the other side of this summer. With college now behind me, I'll be off to the races...I just wish someone would show me where the starting line is and which way to run.

In very short hindsight, this is an amazing choreography of events; at the time when the future is most unclear, I have in front of me one solid, basic, simple step: Serve others in a way that brings the focus back on Jesus. I don’t have a 20 year plan or a big promotion to shoot for—just this one aim into which I am to pour all of myself. I can think of no better way to start off the rest of my life.

Time now for my shameless plug….write me.

Ben Creelman
c/o Beyond Malibu
PO Box 49
Egmont, BC V0N 1N0
Canada

I know it’s hard to lift up that heavy pen, and buy that expensive stamp, and lick that dreaded envelope. But in all reality, your letters are comparatively much more valuable to me than a t-bone steak is to a bloodhound that lives with a bunch of tofu eating hippies. I look forward to hearing from you all and I will try to send letters to be updated to this blog every week or so.

Final Thoughts...

Well… I’m here, home, ‘safe’, and relatively sound. I have so many things I could share from the last month that I don’t know where even to start. First and foremost, the trip I took with my family and friends was simply amazing. Every person on the trip, every step taken, and every rain storm we encountered seemed to have a divine purpose that drew us closer together as a group and closer to God. Life-stories dominated the content of the trip which simply means that each of us spent hours sharing the core things in our lives with one another, anything and everything was fair game, God, family, struggles, successes, tears…you name it. You can’t get much more vulnerable than we did on this trip. (side note: If you have never told the story of your life to your friends and family, do it. There is something intimately moving about sharing your life with someone, and unfortunately our westernized society is so hung up on putting up fronts and facades that no one is willing to bare their triumphs and tragedies in ways that allow them to be truly known.) I can’t adequately share how powerful, draining, and fulfilling this trip was, so I’m not going to waste any more words on feeble explanations. Suffice it to say that I thank God for it, for his hand was almost tangibly present.

The summit of my two summers that this last trip was for me, leads me to think of the current situation that I find myself in now. I am back in the valley, both literally and figuratively. Skagit Valley is my home and here I sit on a beautiful afternoon with the sun shining down and the wind blowing ‘round. The mountains seem distant and hidden, and with them all the raw experiences and breakthroughs that occurred. Only memories and pictures can remind me of the happenings of these last two summers. I can’t help but wonder, What now? I dare not say that life will be the same here in the valley. The sights become normal once again, the comfort level has greatly increased with the addition of showers and microwave ovens, and email has once again gripped my social life. The purity of life that I experienced living in a little logging camp turned Christian commune in the middle of nowhere has once again been blasted by the barrage of advertising that we see here everyday. I won’t even pretend to say or think that I can re-live these exact experiences in the valley. Why is a walk with Christ characterized so well by and ebb and flow of the tide? Why can’t I live on the mountaintop for the rest of my life? I could postulate a thousand different responses for this but the reality of the matter is that the majority of every one of our lives will predominately be spent in the valley. But that is okay.

If our lives truly depended upon where we were in life, we would be in a world of hurt. I can’t help but think that it is not where we are, but who is with us. The same God that was with me on the mountains forming me into who I am now, teaching me to share myself and ask others to do the same, walking with me in a very real way, is the same God that will be with me for the rest of my life no matter the peak or valley that I find myself. It is on this truth that I now live.

I would have said the same thing before my beyond experience. That is that God is with me, and walks with me. But as our good friend Oswald Chambers once shared, the mountain doesn’t necessarily teach us something, it makes us something. Words fail me in my effort to describe what it has ‘made’ me, maybe I’m a little stronger, maybe I’ve got a little more patience, or maybe it simply can’t be described; the truth is that the mountain has drawn me deeper into Christ.

As I look ahead at what is to come and see nothing more that a few steps ahead of me, I can’t help but wonder what storms, peaks, and valleys wait for me ahead. But why worry? It was storms, peaks, and valleys that have drawn me to Christ. So I look forward to what awaits, I look forward to Christ.

Praise God from whom all blessings flow. I have been wanting to write that since the beginning of the summer, but it hasn’t been until now that I have been able to honestly write this in regards to my trips.

This last trip was a bit of a surprise to me in that I was switched onto it after guide teams were decided, but I was incredibly blessed by it. The guys on this trip had one big thing in common, broken lives. Three specific guys had stories that could rival any inner-city sob story. Drug abuse, divorce, alcoholism, and child abuse were all common themes. These guys on the trip, not related, considered themselves brothers because they all came from broken homes, and for the last 4 years have spent almost every day together as a result. All three are very young in their faith, two of them as recently as three weeks ago. But when we reached our 8,300 ft. summit, the prayers that came out of these guys made me understand why Christ said “Let the children come to me, for the kingdom of God belongs to such as these.” If I could only listen to one prayer for the rest of my life, it would be one of those prayers. In any other social setting these guys would intimidate principals and teachers, but in the mountains they could be kids again, they could come as children.

Oddly enough the most comforting part of this whole week was the fact that I feel I had no unique impact on these guys. That is to say that practically any guide could have taken my place and I strongly believe that the guys would have been just as affected by the experience. Although I would love to think that the guys were blown away by my Bible studies and questions during their life stories, this is simply not the case, and if it were, I would be worried. I can’t help but think that the only chance for lasting change lies in the fact that it is based solely on God’s moving in their lives, and not my efforts. So I am thankful that my efforts fell short at times, so that I may remember that God alone is our only hope.

The best part of the story is that these three guys are all moving to college together and have high hopes for diving into Your Life there in Montana. If you think of it, please pray for James, Paul and Chadd as they return from the mountains. Pray that they will continue to see God and search after him even more so, than on their trip.

I can feel the end of summer coming and this chapter of my life seems to be mimicking the change of leaves on the trees around base camp. I am tried, but it’s a good kind of tired. I look forward to entering the mountains one last time this summer, only this time with Papa and the others. I assure you, this will be one heck of a trip. All I can do right now is pray that God will completely surround every aspect of it. I can think of no better preparation

I love every one of you, and thoroughly enjoy every one of your letters

In pursuit of the Father,

Ben